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im just gonna write this very raw and keep it 100

Back to Stories
TAGS:   Drugs , Alcohol , Detox , Rehab
DIEZEL
Share your story

I started using wen I was 15, it started as an on the weekend with friends thing just for fun you know. I travelled through school just as a bit of a quiet kid, when I felt anxiety although I didn't know wat it was at the time, I would hide it by acting a fool just being a clown.

I went along using on the wkend until probs bout 17 by then id tried smoking smack, choof, pills. You see I come from an area in geelong which I will not name that is notorious for drug use and violence.

For a long time I looked at it as the norm my mindset was "im a drug user and this is who I will always be" in my time on the scene I was unfortunate enough to see friends go off the rails, some went psychotic and others went to jail, my father banged speed from when I was a young age and is currently a shard head. but that's another story, I guess i'm trying to build an image of my background.

Anyways the results of using drugs from 15-24 go like this. I stuffed my schooling, jobs family relationships, friendships,my own record with thefts, assaults, restraining orders etc. I became homeless by 21 and it still didn't get me to straighten up I spent two years thieving whatever I could to get on it, I spent multiple times a week in the cop shop and frankly lost a lot of my self respect and respect of those around me. I kept in contact with headspace from about 2009 and an AOD worker continued to support and educate me about my experiences and inspired me to read and educate myself on being more self aware and not letting that situation define me. 

When I say homeless I mean homeless, not couch surfing, the parts u don't hear bout homelessness is this: not showering sucks, not changing ur clothes for sometimes weeks sucks, and the dignity it takes from an individual can never be comprehended unless u live that. 

I went to the Geelong Withdrawel Unit in October 2012 I was anxious but I went just for a break, was my thought process. heres the big part ONCE I WAS CLEAN I REALISED ID WASTED 9 YEARS OF MY LIFE THAT I WILL NEVER GET BACK. sure there are fun times with the boys doing this or that but on your resume its no qualification and I barely remember all the times anyways, not to mention I only have a year 9 education at 24. im 26 now ive gone back to school and am currently studying to become a AOD worker

My advice to anyone is that even if u try to kick whatever your vice is, don't be hard on urself and give up just forgive urself and keep pushing towards whatever your goals are cause we only fail when we give up. 

p.s ive been clean since October 2012 and sitting here 31/5/2014 its an accomplishment I hold close to my heart. I hope I can in some way give back to the community I took a lot from over the years and to those I robbed or wronged I wish u all the best in ur lives

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